Christians need to lighten the fuck up

Now I as a Christian am saying those fucks need to lighten up. It's a movie for one thing. Next thing, is that it's a movie about a FICTIONAL story. So why are they getting so fuckin bent about it? People are saying that it will confuse people. Well let me let you all in on a little secret. EVERYONE IS CONFUSED ABOUT THE BIBLE AND GOD! That's the way it works ya dumbasses! I for the most part am embarrassed by my fellow Christians. Their war on Christmas, the Passion of the Christ, and Pat Robertson are enough to make anyone skip the faith and just say fuck it. But I am concerned for my eternal soul, so I am stuck with these pitiful excuses for representation. Actually, I am not. The way I buck those assholes, most of them think I am some kind of atheist.

10 Greatest Rock Bands Ever

I just read something and it pissed me off. It was the 10 greatest rockbands ever. Well, for one all of the bands listed were from the 60s and 70s. I had sneaking suspicions that this was some baby boomer with an ax to grind and I was correct. While I admit his first 3 selections were correct, the rest were extremely dubious to say the least. I realize that naming the 10 greatest is just about as possible as naming the 10 best cereals of all time. It's all personal opinion. Just because a band sells 10 billion copies of something, certainly doesn't make it great. Year after year the cabellas Deer Hunter is the best selling computer game, but it's probably one of the worst games I have ever played. Britney Spears has sold mega millions of albums but in 20 years will anyone know who she is? Doubtful. Tim Mcgraw, Shania Twain, Toby Keith all are raking in the dough, but have no staying power due to their music being insignificant. I mean is Honkey Tonk Bedonka Donk gonna stand up? Hell, even the people that like it are already tired of it. Country music fans seem to have a really short attention span. That's why Nascar was dumbed down to a series of highlights rather than you getting to watch the entire race as it unfolds. That's why country music singers come out with 3 albums a year. If you don't keep it cranking out, the idiots are going to forget about you. But anyway this string is not about dumbass country music fans. It's about the 10 greatest rock bands of all time. I am limiting this to bands of 3 individuals or more. You cannot have a band with two people. It's a duet if you do that. Oasis fans can all hang themselves. I am limiting this to bands that are by in large rock bands. The Rightous Brothers with their Unchained Melody shit can fuck off. I am going to be unbaised as to whether I like the band or not. Yes Beach Boys fans you are probably going to make the cut. This list is not final........it't just off the top of my head.

1. The Beatles............whew that was easy. Even though I hate the Beatles you cannot deny their influence on just about every type of music.........other than rap but rap isn't music, it's just pissed off black guys talking to music.
2. The Rolling Stones are rolling in at number 2.
3. Led Zepplin Amazingly influencial band.
4. Nirvana Not too many bands can say the touched off an entire new classification of music. I loved the Grunge while it lasted.
5. U2 U2 is an accuired taste but the guys have ruled for the last decade and a half and Bono keeps crankin em out.
6. Metallica Metallica, up until the late 80's was the most perfect tightknit package of a band since Led Zepplin. These guys ate, slept, and shat heavy metal. Too bad they lost their heart.
7. Alice Cooper Alice Cooper was the first shock rock band. All these idiots from Kiss, to Gwar, to Slipknot, are riding on this man coat tails. After near 50 years he is still rockin.
8. Pink Floyd Just about everyone I know loves Pink Floyd. I have even found some music I really like in their massive repetoir of music.
9. AC/DC and Aerosmith These guys come in tied. I don't really know how influential these two bands are but their sounds are so completely different and so compeletly unique. Noone remakes AC/DC songs because let's be serious. Can anyone replace Bon Scotts vocals? Well anyone except Brian Johnson that is.
10. Guns N' Roses Axl Rose was the frontman for the best rockband of the last 20 years. Rivaling the Rolling Stones showmanship, a GNR show had everything. Explosions, Baby Grand pianos, a row of hot scantily clad background singers, a horn section, giant inflatible fire breathing dragon things, and lastly the blistering guitar a guy by the name of Slash. Axl Rose knew how good they were. He had the voice , the writting and composing chops, and Slash. He also had a great supporting cast that was more than willing to go down the road towards rocknroll heaven. What he didn't have was a personality. The man beat up his girlfriends, put his own intrests ahead of the bands, was cocky and abusive to his fans and the press. Then the end came. He began to actually see himself as Guns N' Roses. After the Phenomenon that was the Use Your Illusion 1 and 2 the band self destructed. Not since has there been a group of guys that played with that kind of energy. So while I love GNR I can't have them any higher than 10. In fact they probably shouldn't even be on this list but listening to Mr. Brownstone cured me of not including them on this list.
Honorable Mention
The Ramones
The Clash
The Violent Femmes


Ok there it is. If you don't like it, fuck off.

Women need to start being treated equal

I for one believe that women are not being treated as equals. For one thing, a woman can drown five children and not get fried. Any man that brutally killed 5 children with his bare hands would be strung up and hung by the neck until dead. A woman can have sex with 13 year old students and get away scott free. If a male teacher took a 13 year old girl out, had sex with her 2 dozen times, some of those times in the school, he would be finished for the rest of his life. This woman is probably getting a book deal as we speak. Women can be serial killers and still be painted as a victim. I watched the movie Monster, where a prostitute turned into a serial killer so that she could get money for her girlfriend to live on. It was a touching story of two lezbos just makin their way the only way they knew how..... by killing their tricks. A woman runs over her cheating husband and women everywhere rejoice. A man blows some two timing bitch away, and he's a bastard. Women are given a free pass based on their emotions. They evidently aren't expected to excercise self control. A woman gets abused by her husband. First thing she does is cut his dick off. She get's off. If some abusive bitch, and they are out there, gets her tits cut off the guy would be in a psycho ward so fast his head would spin and rightly so. That Bobbit woman should be in a fuckin straight jacket. Instead she is admired by alot of women for doing it. I have never heard a woman say that she should be in jail. They usually just chuckle when it's brought up. Women are every bit the equal of men, in their good and bad points. They can experience love and hate just like men. So why the fuck do they seem to live by a different set of rules?

The Pirates need a new approach

My beloved Pittsburgh Pirates. One of the most storied professional baseball teams in the entire sport. Screw the Yankees. They come from New York. Half the free world lived there back when the Yankees were in their hayday with Babe Ruth so of course they are going to be popular. The Pittsburgh Pirates did it strictly with their good baseball. Nowadays the Yankees can't even buy a championship. What makes Pirates fans think they can? Pittsburghs management needs to spend more money and not be so content to lose. It's not fun for me to spend 150 dollars on tickets and another 200 on souveneirs and food, just to watch my Pirates get beat 8 to 5. They will put up a good fight, but in the end, a little less power and a little less pitching will always get you. So I have abandoned the beautiful confines of PNC Park to watch some hard chargers from Altoona Pennsylvania. The Altoona Curve! The farm team of the Pittsburgh Pirates. They are winners. The foods great. Best of all, it costs about a quarter of what it takes to go to PNC. Me and the kids have had a blast everytime we go. They are shooting sandwiches into the stands with some kind of airgun. They are giving out t shirts. Fireworks displays, icecream, hamburgers, and some really good baseball. You sit right on the field. The crowd is really enthusiastic. It reminds me of the Bobby Bonilla, and Andy Van Slyke days at three rivers. We used to go there all the time. Had alot of fun there too. These days the Pirates have built a nice park and expect that to be enough. We need to invest in a good team. Not just throw money at it. Spend it in a way that will keep the good talent here, and the overpriced premadonna assholes (Barry Bonds?) out. Pittsburgh has drafted the best talent in baseball for the last decade. Where is it all going?! Look around at the teams contending for pennants to get the answer to that question.

Most Republicans are assholes

I was listening to a segment on some Bill Ohreally hate site and I heard him talking about some new tell all book about Laura Bush. In this book supposedly it is revealed that Laura Bush SMOKES!!! Oh the bad girl! I mean come on. Is this some feeble attempt to make it look as if Mrs. Bush is in fact NOT some brain dead, unblinking, smile machine? To make it look as if she can breathe without having GW tell her to? Well either way, I don't care. I hope the bitch smokes alot more. I will send her a carton a day if that's what it takes. The thing that I really took exception to however was not the attempt to prove that Laura Bush is human. It was their attempt to try and make her into Jackie Kennedy. Supposedly, when Bush got to the Whitehouse, there was spraypaint on the walls, there was vandalism, there was semen on the carpet. For the love of God! The hethens! Well it turns out that NONE of it was true. NOT A BIT OF IT. The only thing that was true was that Hillary took a table. Now it probably wasn't Hillary. It was probably the moving company. I doubt Hillary threw a chest of drawers up on her back and took it. When she found out that it had been accidentaly taken, it was returned. For some reason, dumbass GOP types, like to spread lies. For a group that supposedly represents God on Earth, they certainly have enough vices of their own to go around. Clinton was impeached for a lie. An investigation was started because they GOP wanted to know if the Clintons did anything wrong in some land deal. Yeah they did something wrong. They lost their ass! The deal actually lost money. But that didn't matter. If there was any wrong doing the republicans were gonna find out. They were thorough. While conducting an investigation about a land deal, they even asked about his sexual relationship with a Monica Lewinski. Well being none of their fucking business, and outside of the scope of the investigation, Clinton told them the relationship didn't exist. Well that was a mistake. Because Clinton finally did something that the GOP could impeach him with. You see whitewater turned out to be a wash. No evidence was ever found regarding wrong doing. But they didnt care anyway. They got what they were comming for. Enter Bush..............who lies about just about everything. When he lies, Democrats are playing GOTCHA! When Bush lies it's a misunderstanding. When Bush lies it's to save us from terrorists. Finally, when Bush lies it's only an attempt to destroy a political opponent. Nothing personal Joe Wilson! Why the dickheads in this country put up with that YO YO I will never know. All Bush has to say is that he prays and Pat Robertson starts jacking off so hard he just about looses a filling. I don't know I just get sick of the hipocrisy.

Republicans are in denile

Republicans are in such denile. Seriously kids come on. When it was revealed that Bush himself authorized the leak of a CIA agents name to the press, they should searched their memory banks and realized that Bush had been denying any involvement in the scandal. In fact Bush had at one time vowed to fire anyone involved in the leak. Well turns out there was no leak after all..............because it's within Bushs right as president to unclassify anything he pleases. Fair enough. However! The United States government has been wasting millions of dollars of taxpayer money investigating something that was unnecessary. Why? Because Bush told them to so that he could find out the culprit. The culprit was Bush! Doesn't anyone see how fucking dishonest this was? Bushs people say that he did it for the American people...... Why would I give a shit what Valarie Plame does for a living? He outted her to benefit us? What benefit exactly are we talking about? Oh to fuck up Joe Wilson...............that was exactly what I needed. On its face, Bush lied..........again. He also wasted taxpayer dollars for his own benefit. Not only that, he did it out of spite. Our freedoms, as law abiding citizens, are our rights as Americans. You mean to tell me that reprisals from the government on those that do not share its views are condoned by the GOP? You would think so. Faux news put on the hip waders and mud tires for this one. They are trying to spin this to look like the Democrats are just playing politics. Well it goes to show you that the GOP are just as gutless, if not moreso than the Democrats. Our trust in the government is shaky anyway, without bullshit like this to confirm our suspicions. The 36 percent of America that still approve of Bush are the hard core assfucks that are the root of what's wrong with our country.

PSP demise?

Well farbeit from me to say the PSP is sunk but I will say that there are some nervous Nellys over at Sony. The PSP was to be a flagship system whilst we wait for the illustrious PS3. It was bigger, faster, stronger, than the puny Nintendo DS, and it was going to pummel it into paste. Nintendo all the while remained completely ambivilant to the entire thing. "Oh, the PSP? What's that? It's gonne wipe the floor with the DS? That's nice." I was just standing there with my mouth agape, at the raw power that the PSP had in store. What did the DS have? Nintendogs? That sounds fucking stupid! Evidently the past 10 years have taught Nintendo something. They have lost the smug holier than thou attitude of an entertainment giant, and gotten real savvy. Nintendo used to be the ones crushing all those in their wake. I'm talking to you Sega! Now they are the ones being pushed to the brink. I seem to be one of the few people that actually give Nintendo credit for weathering the storm that is the Playstation 2. The first Playstation killed the Nintendo 64, and Sega Saturn in sales. Nintendo totaly underestimated the Playstation, and it's funny because Nintendo developed the fuckin thing. The Nintendo 64 made money, don't get me wrong, but I will never say that I would rather own a 64 than an original Playstation. The Playstation had it all. It was reasonably priced. It had a great array of games. That's all you need. The Nintendo 64 had about the same games, but since it lacked the CD capacity, it just didn't cut it graphicly, even though it spanked the Playstation hardwarewise. Then at around the same time Playstation 2 and Gamecube came out. I love the Gamecube. It is every bit the equal of the Playstation 2. For whatever reason, the Gamecube got a bad rap. It didn't play DVDs, had no multiplayer, and it's disks were smaller, and had less capacity. The smaller disks had nothing to do with ability, it had everything to do with anti piracy. It was a liability, that really shouldn't have been. The gamecube sold well, but not nearly as well as the Playstation2. Nintendo was religated to a secondplace battle with that green junkpile known as the XBOX. For the record let me just say that HALO is the best game to come out on the XBOX. Let me also say that I own it on the PC and it is mediocre at best. Graphicly its pretty good, but it's repetitive, both in backdrops and gameplay itself. Multiplayer is pathetic. I liked it, but I hardly think it was worth the buzz it created. Metroid Prime for the Gamecube is to this day, probably the most enjoyable game I have ever played, other than GTA: Vice City. I can pick that game up, at any point and have a blast. The entire game, from top to bottom, is fantastic. I challenge anyone to try and not have fun playing that game. The controls are about as close to a PC based First Person Shooter that there is on a console. That brings me to the next bullshit knock on the Gamecube. It only has one analog controler. Number one, anyone that tells you that is lying. Second, most of the fucks that say that don't know the definition of the world analog anyway. The Gamecube controller is by far the best controller of all the Fifth Generation consoles. It's laid out better, and has a more intuitive control style. For sports games you don't have to worry about squares and triangles and bullshit like that. You have buttons where all the bases in baseball are. You can call blitzes in Madden while your thinking about it. If you are with a small child all you have to tell them is press the red button, or press the green button. Comfortable, functional, and durable. The Playstation controller is all of those things, but I just never could get into it. I just thought that it was a bit blocky. Kind of like a N64 controller. It worked but I just never got used to it. After the Playstation 2 came the Gameboy advance SP. Finally the Gameboys could be appreciated. A backlit screen, a rechargeable battery, and a nice compact, comfortable size. Sales , that were already good, skyrocketed. Sony took notice. Their consoles had brought Nintendo to their knees. Their Handheld would certainly deliver the knockout punch. You see, the video console business has profits in the multi billions every year. Sony wanted as much of that as possible. Nintendo was vulnerable. If it's handheld faltered, they were sunk. Enter the PSP. Nintendo had already announced its new handheld, the DS. It would have a touch screen, better graphics than an SP, and could play all the old GB Advanced games! How quaint! Then Sony announced their new Handheld. It's hardware stats blew the DS away. It could hook to the internet. It would play ENTIRE UMD movies. It would come with a browser, a voice chat function, an amazing LCD display, an MP3 player, etc. etc. etc............. The DS was toast before it ever left the blocks. I was more than disheartened. All my friends were planning on buying a PSP. A new Metal Gear game for the PSP? A new Grand Theft Auto game? My God has forsaken me..........PSP was going to be awesome, and I was going to be forced once more to admit that my chosen platform was junk. Then the PSP actually came out. What they neglected to tell anyone was that even though the PSP was pretty swank, it was also very pricey. Sony was also very picky about what they were going to let on the PSP. Homebrew shit became Sonys enemy, because as you know. If you aren't paying for it. Sonys not making any money. And on a PSP they had to make every nickle they could off of it. This was due mostly to the fact that for every PSP sold, Sony was actually losing money. This is due to them expecting to make up the difference on the other end with UMD released movies and lisencing fees for the games. Risky to say the least. Had they not learned the lesson of Sega Gamegear and Atari Lynx? When superior handhelds bit the dust due to poor planning and the desire to deliver the knockout punch with one decisive blow. While I am not really to proclaim the PSP dead, I can certainly say that the news is not good. Walmart is going to scale back its support of UMD movies. Other retailers are going to do the same. Sony itself is going to release fewer titles due to poor sales. When once they cringed at the thought of making the PSP TV compatible, now Sony is tripping over themselves promoting the same. It's too late. The PSP game market is already weak. Coupled with crappy movie sales and you have one grade A stinker on your hands. Sony has invested millions in this project and it's on the cusp of going into the tank. If I told you that I would not shit myself with joy I would be lying. The DS delivered on all its promises and more. Now the DS had voice chat incorporated into their games. The WiFi is free and stable. The games are plentiful and alot of fun. The PSP is just expensive. The end for this system cannot come fast enough for me. My only regret is that we won't have the PSP to kick around anymore.

Still surprised at Bush after all these years?

More and more about our pal W comes out over time, and people actually have the nerve to be surprised. It came out today that George himself authorized the leaking of Valarie Plames identity. All at the prodding of Dick Cheney of course. Mr. Libby was instructed by his bosses to release information in an attempt to discredit Joe Wilson. You would think that this would be a newsbomb. You would think that this story would explode on the news and people would finally say, "You know? That Bush is a liar! I'm not gonna trust his kind anymore." Did you hear? Did you see? Nope. Not much of a ripple at all. People have been getting beaten over the head with Bushs lies for almost 6 years now, and they don't seem to care.

Un Necessary list of 2006

I am compiling a list of things that someone thought that we couldn't live without......... Topping the list as the number one thing I could do without is..................Basic Instinct 2. Now I have to admit. The first time I watched this movie wayyyyyyyyyyyyyy back in '92 I thought it was pretty kick ass. Of course I watched because I wanted to see Sharon Stone cross her legs. That was pretty much it. Then I made the mistake of watching it a few more times and realized that the movie sucked ass. Not to mention the more I watched it the more I had to admit that when Miss Stone crossed her legs, you don't get to see a Goddamned thing. Some people will tell you that you see the promise land. Me. Well. I don't see anything except alot of darkness. Maybe that's the point. Sharon Stones got a huge ass hogie hole. Anyway. Sharon Stone was pretty hot back then. So you got to see some pretty realistic "relations" going on and as far as I can remember, no Michael Douglas ass. Thank God! However! Fast forward 14 years. Now we have an elder Sharon Stone. I'm not impressed. You can tell that she has been involved in some serious bodily renovations. I could probably get into a straight to DVD sequel, that had Jessica Alba as the villaness. Some movies you can just tell there is gonna be a sequel. I mean, when I saw Star Wars Episode One I just KNEW there was gonna be a sequel. Passion of the Christ? Nope. Titanic? Nope. Basic Instinct? It was not necessary. The number one unnecessary thing from 2005 makes its yearly appearance on the list in the number two spot this year. NASCAR. This yearly right of passage for idiots all around the country celebrates the skill of driving in circles in colorful "stock" cars. Occassionally one of these pricks gets mad that one of his fellow "drivers" cheats and walks out on the track and throws his helmet at the other car. Boy Jethro! Thats manly! The one redeaming quality of NASCAR is that sometimes you get to see one of these assholes get his ass killed. At number three is Jennifer Love Hewitts new show, Ghost Whisperer. Christ woman! You had most of male America eating out of the palm of your pretty little hands a few years ago now look at you. You are on a shitty show with the female equivalent to a bowl cut on your head. We already had a crappy show where the protagonist sees dead people. We have achieved maximum stupid ass concept density. In the number 4 spot is Amanda Bines and Hillary Duffs careers. Amanda Bines is riding Hillary Duffs coat tails in this one due to her not nosing her way into a singing career. Hillary Duff cannot sing. I don't know who told her that she could but her voice is absolutely lifeless and flat. Although it is mercifully on key (most of the time), it has no power behind it. The studio has voiced over her songs but you can still tell she sucks. The old saying, "You can't paint a tird." comes to mind. Is she hot? Hell yeah but her no talent sister is even hotter and her career is in the toilet. Amanda Bines is being shoe horned into the title of "young actress". They really throw that term around loosely these days. At number 4 is the show "The Simple Life". I really don't like Paris Hilton. I don't think she's all that hot. I'm of a mind that a womans personality is half of her allure. She can be physically attractive and be bitch or a loon and that will totaly kill the hotness. Some chick on the MTV show, Next, the other day was marginally hot but when it came to her likes and dislikes it listed the fact that she preferred the smell of body odor to perfume. Hey I like a freak as well as the next guy but my God thats nasty. Fuckin nasty. Any hotness she had got trumped by the fact that her "flower" is probably badly groomed and stanky. Paris is far from the best looking girl I ever saw. That little troll (Nichole Richie) that skulks around the country with her is fuckin gross. Both are mega bitches. Why people think we want to watch it is beyond me. Guess that hints to the general publics rampant stupidity. Now last, and certainly least, stumbling in at number 5, are parades. Parades were cool at one time. Then we invented the wheel and we had better things to do. Think of it. Standing next to a street, usually in the rain, watching highschool kids, usually the fat pimplefaced ones, walk down the street playing music. You throw in some asshole public figures that you didn't vote for, in old cars and some Shriners and you got a perfectly good afternoon wasted. Now I realize that some people have a dog in the parade fight. Their kid is marching, or waving, or won some hog breeding contest and they want to see their little darling doing their thing. I can understand those people. But the people that watch that god awful Thanksgiving Day parade and the parade of Roses. Piss on that. Unlike NASCAR where they will show the wrecks over and over and over again to my delight, when a balloon say knocks over a lamp post sending it careening into the crowd? They bleep it out, cut to the previous years footage, and read from a script...........don't laugh it really happened this past year. So there is no redeaming quality to parades at all. Unless it's one of those cool parades with missles and tanks and guys walking down the street doing the goose step. Now that shits cool.